Friday, February 26, 2010

Boy, am I human....

Never before has it been quite so obvious that I am a flawed human being. Made in the perfect image of God, but not perfect by any means. I'm not being too hard on myself, honest. Just a wake up call that I am not all that and a bag of chips most days. {Not that I think I am, just sayin'}

God showed up...again.

My need to control and understand ten steps ahead of me is a huge thorn in my side. Why can't I relax and go with the flow? It's my spiritual gift to get my panties in a bunch, I honestly jokingly say. My uncanny ability to see things in the way people talk, react and behave can and DOES get me into trouble. It's weird. I'm pretty good at reading people who are upset, feeling left out or hurt, but I have no clue when my mouth is moving that I am making someone that way. It's also my spiritual gift to open mouth, insert foot.

I said to God this morning {after two long days} that I just don't understand men. I am fairly confident God laughed about that because I was immediately reminded that HE is a MAN. I know, ladies, I know.

I love, love, love, love, love my husband. He is a man...a real man like I've never known before, but a man none the less. He doesn't pick up on the unspoken words us girlies speak when we are upset, in need, hurt or otherwise. He does, on the other hand, want to know {which puts him 800 heads above most men in my book}. He just can't know without being told because that's how God made him. As necessary as it is, it's hard to tell a man what you feel and how you hurt. We want our man to look in our eyes and FEEL it or to be so in tune to who we are that no words need be spoken. That's ridiculous and truly unfair to him...not to mention too trashy romance novel for words!

So I'm learning. I'm learning to say what needs said while remembering that just because I can, it doesn't always mean that I should.

Boy, am I human.

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